Saturday, July 28, 2007

Big Brother And K.C./The Tough Days.



K.C.'s brother (Big Brother) has been sick as I mentioned in an earlier post. He is to have his tonsils removed on August 9th. He has just finished up a bottle of antibiotics (the pink stuff) and today, he is with fever AGAIN! His neck feels like there are two knots on each side (I guess its his glands, they feel big.) I did call his doctor who said to bring him in on Monday or to Emergency if he got any sicker. Any sicker? This kid has been sick enough this year! I am now wondering if he has built a resistance to the antibiotics he has been taking? I am giving him Tylenol for the fever and it is helping. Hopefully it's just a virus this time around and not the dreaded strep! Big Brother hasn't been outside much at all and has been reading Harry Potter (Deathly Hallows) every spare second he gets. K.C. has been well am I am ever so thankful for that. He is now watching Inuyasha at this late hour because he will not go to sleep for anything. If I can't get him to sleep soon I will give him a Clonidine. I don't like to give him Clonidine unless absolutely necessary and have only been using it twice a week. Tonight we are thinking of our dear friends Melissa and Conor. We hope you are getting some ZZZZZZ's and feeling better.
Before I had K.C., I used to take sleep for granted. I never dreamed in a million years that sleep of all things would be very hard to come by! K.C. is sleeping better these days, but still has his days where he'll be up til 3 or 4 a.m. and stay awake, grouchy as hell the rest of the day. I was sure that when he turned around 6 months old he'd been sleeping through the night. Nope, never happened, if anything, he'd wake up at night and turn the lights on and off a zillion times. I was sure our neighbors though we had some kind of freaking electrical problem with our lights. Then came the little doors on the inside of the refrigerator door. You know the little doors that open where you can put, butter or something that close in size? Well he would get up at night and open and close these doors for as long as he could until I stopped him. He would scream his head off, I mean scream for a good 1 1/2 if I stopped him from opening and closing. I'll never forget the day his Daddy took the little "butter doors" off the refrigerator. K.C. had headbanging fits because the little doors were no longer there and I for some strange reason began to think his dad as "mean" for taking the doors off. I resented him. Those were tough days, at one point I didn't think our marriage was going to last because of the huge amount of stress. We blamed each other and could never agree on what to do to help K.C. His Dad wanted me to just leave him be, no therapy, nothing. He felt that K.C. was "retarded" and it was our job to take care of our "retarded son." After alot of counseling, ALOT of counseling, K.C.'s Dad had said something I could have never imagined in a million years. He thought he was being cursed for something he had done in his last life. This is why K.C. had Autism. Those were very tough trying days. His crying seemed endless. I thought I was going to lose what little mind I had left. It's hard to believe and I could never ever have imagined things getting any better but finally things have gotten better and K.C.'s gotten older. I can't believe it has taken 6 years! Through the crying and headbonking K.C. has finally started to leave the crying days behind. He still cries but it's alot shorter now, he seems to understand a little better. Maybe as he has gotten older and is understanding a little better the crying has lessened? I am just grateful it's better and the poor kiddo isn't sad these days. He's learning and I am so proud of the little fella! I love K.C. and Big Brother will all my heart, these little guys are why I live, they are all I think of. Autism is tough but that smile K.C. shows on happy days melt all the yucky days away. For parents of younger children with Autism, things do get better as they get older. It just takes Time, Love, Prayers, Patience and ABA (ABA in our case has helped K.C. tremendously, every child is different though, a different teaching method could be better for your kiddo.)

11 comments:

Jan B said...

My husband has had a very hard time dealing with Charlie's autism too. I think that if there is one thing that has driven a huge wedge between us, it's that.

Donetta said...

Good morning Little Mommy, I hope you were able to rest some. Is big brother doing better today? May I suggest no Dairy today or this week. The mucus can overwhelm the mucus membrains. I hope that the infections clear up fast so the schedule can be kept. I know KC demands so much of what you have. It is hard for you to give big brother all you want to too. I hope that you and your husband have a few moments to embrace today. Is your husband doing better too? I know that the false guilt can be a torment. My hubby feels so bad about how her responds sometimes.My hubby often acts out of a love and defensiveness toward me. Then if I get upset he feels doubly boxed in. It is so hard to always remember that the little ones are not just like any kid and our responses have to match their abilities. That is so hard some days!My Dove has sleep problems too. I will hold you in my prayers.

kristina said...

It's good to remember and note how things have changed----I do think Charlie has done better with somethings because he is older, understands more, can manage his emotions (something we moms still have to work on, no?).

Hope Big Brother fills much better soon!

kristi said...

My daughter did develop a tolerance for the "pink antibiotic". We finally had to use something stronger. We were at the dr. every 6 weeks with an upper respiratory infection! Hope big Bro gets better soon!

Niksmom said...

Boy, I can relate to the antibiotic tolerance...Nik went through a period of time for months when he would be on antbiotics roughly every 6-8 weeks. We had to cycle through a whole bunch (and he's allergic to amoxicillan). Hope things work out for big bro's surgery!

Sam I Am said...

Have been away from a computer this past month and couldn't wait to get caught up with you! Sorry that Big Brother is so sick. Praying he feels better and gets those tonsils out soon.

Clonidine is my big saver for Sam. I have long adjusted to no sleep,but it is so hard to watch him in the days when his lack of sleep effected his functioning so much.

You are an amazing mom!

JUST A MOM said...

hey girl thank you so much for sharing and look at where you are now.... even from the start of me reading here KC has gotten so much better to me....

Melissa H said...

Oh Tina. :-( Sorry that you're not getting sleep. I was up with Conor from 4:52 until 5:56, and then was up for the day at 6:40 (and, of course, dh and I went out birthday shopping last night and didn't get to bed until almost 1). I know exactly what you mean about how you thought that sleeping was not ever going to be something that you would take for granted. Conor used get up and do the same type of stuff, until we turned his lock around and locked him in his room at night. I used to be petrified that he was going to get out of the house or end up in the bottom of the pool (at our old house).
Still, he would wake up and scream and bang on the door. Then, he'd just get into stuff in his room.
Hope we get some sleep soon. :-/
Hugs.

Donetta said...

I was just thinking about all the antibiotics. Have you been supplementing him with any live culture yogurt or assidulphlis. The antibiotics kill all the good guys (bacteria ) too. This can be obtained in the refer section of your grocery store look for chew able for him .

Lora said...

I feel so bad for Big Brother, he must be so miserable. You have been and still are going through a heck of a lot Tina but you still have such great perseverance and I truly admire your stamina. You are such awesome mommy to your boys, keep up the great work, you should be really proud of yourself! We love you guys dearly and treasure your friendship so very much.

Donetta said...

Is all well?