Saturday, February 21, 2009

Thank God for Habilitation and Respite

K.C.'s Support coordinator and Adam my little brothers Support Coordinator came by for their 2 month visit. They come every two months to check up on the boys. K.C.'s Support Coordinator said that I looked, "very tired" and encouraged me to use my Habilitation and Respite hours for the boys. I promised her I would. I have had these hours all along and really haven't utilized them as much as I should have.

So yesterday and today the boys Daddy and I made our list of questions to bring along as we checked places out. I would be asking most of the questions (their Dad feels better if I do the talking cause his English is broken badly) and their Dad would be checking to see if the place looked escape proof and to see if there was anything out in the open that shouldn't be, like chemicals cleaners etc.

We visited 4 centers in all. We both agreed that the last place we checked which was this morning was best for Adam and K.C. It had many educational centers going on, sensory room and best of all both boys would be within arms reach of their habilitator at all times. There was an area for bigger kids, in fact there was even a program for adults. The adults come in the morning and leave before 2 p.m. At that point there is a huge sign that says, "No Adults Beyond This Point After 2 p.m." So K.C. and Adam will be going straight to the center after school and I will be picking them up at 6 p.m. The center wants them to come everyday but I think it's too much, after all I have to see my boys still! So 3 days a week they will go and on Saturday from 10am to 3p.m. K.C.'s Dad was convinced the place was escape proof for the boys because we couldn't even get out the door to leave, those child locks are tricky. I still worry though, most of you remember what had happened not that long ago that K.C. did escape from home. It was horrible and I have become extremely careful each day.

Big Brother and I are going to be spending time at some of the places he wants to go but can't go when K.C. and Adam are home because it's too noisy for them. Even when I do go somewhere with Big Brother alone, he kinda shuffles around and looks sad like he's missing something. I have to try to let him know it's o.k. if we go sometimes without the boys. I have told him that even if we did take them they wouldn't have a good time because of the noise (we have tried several times)and the boys would appreciate it we didn't bring them to such noisy places. Big Brother is not so convinced.

UPDATE: I started this post on Saturday and it's now Sunday afternoon. We have just came back from the skateboard park with Big Brother ( it's an older video but you get the idea. while we were there I noticed I was the ONLY parent supervising my child. I watched Big Brother skateboard and noticed an older guy probably about 20 to 25 years old walked in to the skate area. He had no skateboard or bike. Then I noticed a bunch of little kids and 1 teenager go to the guy. I was sitting across from them. Me being the nosy Mom like I am listened to what they were saying. Most of it was in Spanish as they were all Hispanic. (I took 3 years of Spanish I high school.) This guy was saying, "I have some candy that will make you feel like your in heaven." Then I watched him pull this bag of drugs right out of his duffel bag in front of EVERYONE. He then asked a kid about 11 years old, "wanna roll a joint." The kid said, "yeah." They were smoking POT! I could not believe this was happening. Big Brother rode over to me and said, "Mom that cigarette smells funny, is it a different kind?" I picked up my cell phone and dialed 911 and spoke to the operator very quietly. I explained what was going on and she sent an officer our way. I stayed on the phone with her keeping an eye on the children and the guy. When the guy saw the cops come, he reached into his pants and threw the bag of drugs into the duffel bag and walked away. The officer approached him and asked him straight away where the bags were. The guy looking like he's all innocent says, "you can even search me." Another cop came and walked toward us. I then told him his bag was at the foot of the stairs. They retrieved the bag and put the cuffs on the guy (*who was wanted) and took the kids to their parents house.

We will not be going back there ever again. We will drive a little further to a different skate park that is in a better safer area. The world is so dangerous, kids have to be supervised nearly every second.


kristi said...

OMG!! No way would my child be at a skate park alone. No way!!

Hope you guys enjoy the respite care!

Nicki Mann said...

Wow, is that a scary story about what happened at the park! What a low life, giving a joint to an eleven-year-old! Marcus, the 13-year-old who was living with us, went back to live with his mom in the city yesterday, and he starts school there today. I kept telling him, "Don't join a gang, don't do drugs," because I don't even know how else to say it... kids now know that that stuff is out there and available to them. :(

gretchen said...

Great great news about the respite- I'm so glad you are taking advantage of that and making some special time for yourself and for Big Brother. You both deserve it!

I'm astounded by the story about the skate park!!! Good for you for being observant and turning the guy in, but how about all the other parents who weren't there to supervise? Unbelievable.

Melissa H said...

My gosh, Tina! I swear, you should be a cop! That's twice this year that you've apprehended criminals! LOL
Seriously, how very scary that this can happen. And I want to smack parents that don't watch their kids in the head for that very reason.
I've said it a million times, but it is never enough: YOU ARE AN AMAZING MOM.

I wish we lived closer!

Casdok said...

Good for you!

Hope you and Big Brother enjoy your quality time together.
And hope the K.C. and Adam enjoy the center.

Niksmom said...

Wow. Lots going on! So glad you're going to be using the respite hours; you and big brother both need them and KC and Adam need the activity, too. :-)

Kudos to you for what you did at the park! OMG, I think I would've had a heart attack! I can understand why you won't be going back there! Whew.

Hope you are well. xo

redheadmomma said...

dude, seriously, I think trouble just follows you around!!! I have never been able to forget about the time those guys were trying to steal your car, and I've long thought since then, "I need to be as with it as Tina to have my phone charged at all times in case of emergency." Brilliant how you keep your wits about you!
The place for K.C. & Adam sounds wonderful, and I promise you, once you get used to the respite, you'll feel so great. And you'll miss them even more when you pick them up. Be happy you had four to choose from, I don't know of ANY in the Seattle area....

JUST A MOM said...

wow how sad,,, your such a great open eyed person I hope the boys parents cared and did something about their kids.

Lora said...

Tina, you are MOM of the year! I admire you in so many ways, you are so incredible! WTG on calling 911 and thinking quick on your feet about that whole would be good at working for the FBI like I used to.

I am so glad that the two boys are at the day hab, that is so great. You are in need of a break and it is good that you and BB get to have some quality time together.

Melinda said...

glad you can use the respite care. When I first moved back to Ohio with Noah we also qualified for it....but here in this county they do it in someone else's home! NOT at a center that is more structured and controlled. I had huge issues with taking Noah to someone else's home to be "watched" that I did not know...I don't care if they are registered with the MRDD board or not and have been used without problems in the past or not. I too have trust issues I guess....but I want Noah to be safe!

I only qualified for 10 hours a month.....but that was better than zero hours I guess.

Now it is 3 years later and I have never used any of the respite care. I wish our county had a similar situation for respite care you have!

Jonesy said...

That guy had some nerve. Way to bust him!