Monday, September 21, 2009

Very Sad Week Pray For Us

My Dad has been struggling with the flu (flu like symptoms) over a two month period. Over the two months he got Pneumonia and has had Asthma ever since I can remember. I remember him always carrying an inhaler. He's also been depressed since Mom passed away in April. He passed away last week very quietly in his sleep. The folks at the care home called me at 5 a.m. and asked me to come to the centre. I knew it was going to happen. I had the feeling. I called Rabbi Levy and he did show up an hour later. Called relatives, said they would leave as soon as possible. My Dad's brother lives in Israel along with his wife and children. If it wasn't for Rabbi Levy and his kindness I couldn't have planned alone. I have been so scatterbrained not to mention this week Rosh Hashanah. It's given me strength that I need and my children need. The Shiva was so hard. I didn't think I could do it. I just kept thinking of Mom and now Dad and how lonely he's been without her. They did everything together. I have watched his health go down the tubes since Mom passed away. He just lost any love for life. It weakened him. Broke my heart. Still breaking. We feel very alone now. I only have my grandma who is very old. Now I keep thinking she will be leaving us soon.

Dad's brother asked that the boys and I come to stay with his family in Israel for a couple weeks. I'm not sure. Scatterbrained I am. Sorry this post is so scattered. Maybe getting away would be good for me but the boys routines would be so interrupted I think it would be extremely tough. Our helper who is also Jewish says she would come along to help with Adam and KC. I'm thinking yes we should try...still don't know. For sure nothing is certain.